Own yourself

Once a week I teach a strength and conditioning class for a competitive local swim team. The kids range in ages for 12-17 and all of them are a pleasure to coach. Each class is different, fun, and challenging both for me and them. As the weeks have gone on, I have gotten to know each kid and get a glimpse into their lives and the challenges and joys of our youth today.

 A couple weeks ago I was talking to one girl who was having difficulties preforming certain exercises. Her low back really hurt when we did certain core work—especially crunch type movements. She went on to say she had been in and out of physical therapy for a couple years. Her lower core was really weak. I probed for further explanation of exercises that hurt and ones that didn’t. Finally she gave in, “I’m just so tall, and I’ve always wanted to not be so tall. The taller I got, the more I slouched so I wouldn’t seem so tall.

 Ok. Wait. WHAT? You’re so tall and you don’t want to be so tall!? Let’s back up. I am 5’3. When I was this girls’ age, I always wanted to be taller. Just a little taller. One more inch and I would be happy. EVERYONE was taller than me. And this girl had the body my teenage self dreamed of having: 5’8, rail thin, but somehow still had curves even before she grew all the way into herself. And here she was, wishing she wasn’t so tall, doing anything possible to make herself shorter. Even slouching to the point of hurting herself and needing to go to physical therapy.

 I gave the rest of the class enough exercises to occupy themselves for awhile, and then sat down to have a nice chat with this girl. We talked about her posture, how after awhile her poor posture stretched out certain muscles, and shortened and weekend other muscle. Because of this muscle imbalance, when it came time for her to preform certain exercises, she simply could not do them. We talked about corrective exercises, and stretching she could do to counter-act this issue. All the things we talked about, I’m sure she had heard from at least one physical therapist before she heard it from me, her trainer.

 Its been a few weeks since this incident, but I keep playing it over in my head. I’m glad I said to her what I did say, but there is so much more I wish I had said. Maybe some things that no one has said to her before. Or at least some things she needs to here more often.

 I wish I had told her that she had a strong, capable, amazing body that allows her to do and see awesome things. I wish I told her, that as a teenager, no one truly feels comfortable in their own skin and body. Give it a couple years, you’ll get there. Stand up straight. Be proud of those hella long legs that reach my shoulders. Dang girl! Own your body and you will own the world! Believe me, no happiness comes from wanting to be taller, shorter, smaller feet, perkier boobs, brown eyes, smaller ears, etc., etc., And everyone has certain things they wish they could tweak--work to change what you can, like strengthening that lower core.

 I didn’t tell her any of that. I wish I did. There are certain things within our bodies we can change, like BMI, and aerobic threshold, and there are other things we can’t change and no happiness comes from wishing we could.

 Gone are the days I wish I were taller. I love being 5’3. It has some serious perks, like still being able to shop in the girls department, and not standing a head above everyone else if I decide to wear six inch heels. Yes, it does have some disadvantages—not every pair of pants looks good with a cuffed hem. But, dang girl! Own your 5'3 self, embrace the body you got. Take care of it. Be good to it. You'll never regret loving yourself.